I was listening to Madge the other day, banging on about this and that and not much of the other. Madge, having over indulged as seemed appropriate to the silly season, has been taking to the waters off Altona West Refinery Beach on a daily basis, wearing her fin de siecle bloomers inside out to save on the laundry bills, much to the consternation of the locals. What a sight! Donations will be gratefully received at the Altona Home for Distressed Gentlefolk, or the Whale Protection Society, as you deem appropriate..
Madge told me, in between sucking on a limp roll your own, that Hortense has been going cold turkey ever since her Christmas blow out, and it is not a pretty sight. Hortense, who would kill for a roll of her own, limp or otherwise, was probably not at the inaugural 2012 Jam and Ballad Mangling Session. Chateau de Leinster last Sunday.
Which puts her in a distinct minority, as every man and his dog rolled up – ah yes, the sessions are back with a vengeance There was the Captain and Lugubrious Frank being joined by six drummers , several called Tom, James or Danielo, Don and the Kevinator playing cool guitarist, four piano players, Fred de bongo, Louis the Mellodica going OTT, Anton slapping the bass, Debbie, Kay, newcomer Jo recentlly escaped from Queensland on tonsils, plus another singer whose name I completely forgot , Gentlerman Jack on the slush pump, and I forget who else. In all 22 people got up and murdered or mangled something or other, in front of a ridiculously large audience: and a jolly good time was had by all.
Which makes this, by my count, about as big a jam session as any since the Dizzy’s era. Ridiculous innit!
Could we all try and be a bit more sensible next week, please. TW